December 27, 2007

Fred surges ahead in Iowa

In the temporal sense, at least.

"There is no woman on the horizon that ought to be president next year, let's all agree on that." Thus spake Fred D. Thompson, the somnolent former Tennessee actor and Hollywood senator with his own occasionally articulated aspirations to the presidency.

Assuming Fred is referring to Hillary Clinton, and assuming by next year he means 2008, then let's all agree that the best Mrs. Clinton can hope for is to be the president-elect by the end of November. The inauguration won't take place until January 20, 2009, the year after next year, and perhaps the year during which Fred does feel a woman ought to be president. It's hard to tell, because Fred barely knows whether or not he wants to be president himself.

Assuming he means Nancy Pelosi, and setting aside Fred's value judgment embodied in the word "ought," she stands a better chance at becoming president next year, since the Speaker of the House is second in the order of presidential succession. Unlikely, albeit possible. But "ought"? That depends on your secret desires pursuant to the mortality and/or incapacitation of Messrs. Bush and Cheney.

This has been today's American civics lesson for Fred "Wake Me Up When It's Over" Thompson, the sleepy GOP choice.


Fred dozes through the remaining days of December, 2007

1 comment:

capper said...

Fred only surges after taking his Viagra.