Paul Ryan's (R—Côte de Nuits) budget triage

1. Impoverished imaginary children
2. Impoverished blastocysts
3. Actual impoverished children

According to a supporter:

"If [Congressman Paul Ryan is] guilty of anything, it's of caring too much for the children of tomorrow and not enough for the children of today," said historical theologian Mark Johnson.

It's how Jesus and the pope would have wanted it, argues Paul Ryan.

The $700.00 in wine [Congressman Paul Ryan's table for three] consumed over the course of 90 minutes amounted to more than the entire weekly income of a couple making minimum wage.

Let them drink 2004 Domaine Robert Jayer-Gilles Echezeaux du Dessus.*

* "A really mediocre year in Côte de Nuits."

Not to worry — the hungry children won't know any better.