Joe Barton, Man of Geophysics

Wadn't Alaska up thar in Texas before it was down thar in Alaska?

A long-time denier of global warming, Joe Barton has [notwithstanding that] used the threat of global warming to combat something he hates even more: wind energy. In a 2009 hearing, Barton implied that wind is a "finite resource" and that harnessing it would "slow the winds down" which would "cause the temperature to go up." — TIME

That's the most powerful Republican on the House Energy and Commerce Committee. Frightening or hilarious, you make the call.

And it's a good thing fewer people will be out tanning on Florida's western beaches, because that means the Sun will stay on longer.

Niagara Falls slowed to a trickle when they put those turbines in.

More recently Joe Barton did a U.S. Supreme Court majority one better, declaring oil companies not just persons but emotionally sensitive and needy persons yearning for external affirmation.

Barton's latest antics were said to be repellent even to Republicans, "including David Vitter," according to a knowledgeable source.