Walker fails in ruse to prevent marriage

A Milwaukee couple, whose nuptials are to be celebrated this afternoon, attempted to obtain their marriage license at the courthouse yesterday, only to find salaried county executive Scott Walker, the Republican candidate for governor, off on vacation.

A librarian finally tracked down John Barrett, Milwaukee County clerk of circuit court. Word of the predicament eventually reached a maintenance worker, who unlocked the county clerk's office.

Despite Walker's mandated furlough day, the pair will unite in traditional marriage at 1 p.m., thanks to the stalwart efforts of several dedicated county employees, AFSCME District Council 48.

Almost immediately thereafter, reports began to emerge that the clerk of court's brother, Milwaukee mayor Tom Barrett, has decided to run for governor of Wisconsin against Scott Walker.